the inside of my pocket

The picture is missing on this one.
It was supposed to be a shop window.
A stunning dress.
A reflection of a tree.
A car or two whizzing by.
A contrast of the solid and the insubstantial.
But-
The picture is missing-
I don't know-
One of those technological errors
Inexplicable.

time

Last time, lost time, time lapse, times up, time to go, out of time, now is the time, time to commit, ahead of time, past time, fleeting time, waste of time, unbridled time, unrecorded time, uncaptured time, time machines, menstral time, playtime, relief time, time zone, universal time, eastern standard time, mountain time, time travel, daylight savings time, timeout, tick tock tick tock, time passing,… passing …passing

I remain
Motionless
A shadow
grounded with no substance.
outlines blurred filled with nothing but a shifting shade of grey.
nothing to say
nothing
nothing
I

dnǝ ǝɥʇ

Art is long and life is short, and success is very far off. - Joseph Conrad

Damn.
Bitch.
Say what's on your mind.
Can't get warm.
Just like to know where it all ends. See?
Regrets?
Don't get me started.
Dead ends?
Road seemed right at the time.
Look but don't leap.
Yeah. Something like that.
This is a more lucid moment.
Not splitting the seams.
Don't wanna jump out of your skin.
Splitting headache the past three days.
Acupuncture is good for that.
Need a relief valve.
That's what I'm sayin'.
Things have a way of building up.
Moxa- Cups. Girl I know uses fire.
In the cup?
Creates a seal. Moves the blood.
Flips the switch?
Sets you right.
Hmm.

Natalie

“Why did you do that why did you do that? You fucked me up. You fucked me up!”
She tries to back up but he lurches his body forward trapping her against the front doors.
“You gave my card to that bitch? That whore? Why did you do that?”
“I’m sorry sir, I’m already in a lot of trouble if you would like too….”
“Sorry? You’re sorry? “ A globule of spit launches from his seething lips and adheres to her eye lashes. His swollen paunched face billows through her vision as he lumbers back and forth pierced by her magnified eyelash.
“I want to know what you’re going to do about it?”

Through the window she watches another one of her customers, seated for 4 hours at the long picnic table clutching steins of "banana beer," as the burst into random acts of chanting, "USA! USA! USA!" One of the boys is no leaning over his mug, his mouth slacked over the rim refilling the glass with slow jerks of his abdomen while the rest of his cronies giggle and cheer.

fleeting

Bathroom stalls hold a litany of sweetarts and savageries and I wonder how many of them still hold true.

bird

“Of course, I had to. I love doing that .I took 80 bucks with me. I had too. Because I’m like “What is this like Melrose?” I was like I didn’t realize I was working at Melrose place.” It all good and that your fucking everybody, I’m not going to judge you on that, cause granted, women power. It’s fucking awesome, sweet. But I’m not part of that. I’m too sensitive. I got too much gentileness. I can throw a soft sweater on and feel the lambswool and enjoy it you know. So she comes in last night or too nights ago and she’s like. “You’re not going to talk too me anymore?” and I’m like, “oh…no… I’m just busy.” And I’m like “fuck you come on if there’s that much drama at the get go, fuck you. I don’t need it. I don’t need it.”

can't go home yet

its all fun and games until you're left alone at the bar to laugh to/at yourself.

Small talk tidbits , trying to find a way in.

Michalob55. “How's the game?" "Lakers and Celtics. Great teams but not very exciting." Why can he not keep his eyes off it.

Bluepointtoasted and magnumofmagnus "you need to weld into the metal joist…”

bacardigoldandcoke, "taste like crap but they're handing them out free."

Dickleneat, can't hear a word beyond the scent of something rotting behind his teeth.

cosmogrrl and pintofwaterwithstraw, "i knew it was going to be cheesy, but I loved it." "yeah, i mean at first, her conversation with Big, it took me a while. I mean, like 5 minutes, and then I was totally into it."

milkstout, "cute top." Maybe he figured I can hear him over the din of the bar, and thats why he poked my boob.

marlboroughreds," so..." his pocket starts to ring and vibrate simultaneously, "sorry... of jezzus... nevermind... so what was i saying?" The pocket lights up again, "oh... hold on a second... What?!!!!"

Yawn. Sip. Sigh.Seek.Retreat. Sip. Look. Scan. Disregard. Scan. Smile. Watch. Sigh. Yawn.

another forgetful day in hipsterville

apparently I am very forgettable.

"Oh..." (First off we never slept together.) "Yeah..." (but we've been introduced time and time again) "Hey" (hung out for hours actually.) what's up" (there is no question. Just a statement. They are not really expecting an answer.) There is only the slow turn of our bodies in the opposite direction.(sigh)

"i am not the oldest person here. I am not the oldest person here." a mantra I repeat over and over as i scan the crowd of scantly clad tattooed Sailor Jerry dolls and the skinny tight jean droopy draw dweebs that love them sipping on mason jars of planters punch and gnaw on slabs of bacon butchered in the cellars beneath our chuck tailored feet.

Alas, the lies I tell myself rattle in the bottom of my empty glass since there is no one here to spread them over.... I head to the front door. No one says a word. To me. I slip past the door baby and her latest admirer (who really just wants to get past her, through the front door without the magic wooded coin that grants one passage to a bevy of rum infused cocktails and pork laden buns dripping with sauce.) I turn for one last glance, not one bespecked soul notices.