Do not wear a belt - it is very difficult to lift pants off the floor let alone put them on without making noise.
Do not leave panties, leggings, or jeans on the floor when there is a dog present. (This will not be the dingos first panty snack, nor his last.)
Do not attempt to ride a skateboard in order to get there faster, does not make for a quiet ride of shame.
Bring a condom, men never provide. (recommend stocking your own "dirty whore kit" in a small bag that can be stuffed in purse - condoms, wet nap, lysterine strips, baby wipes, fresh pair of panties.)
Expect texts between 1am and 3am. This is primetime, so if already engaged, make sure to turn phone off.
If any feelings towards the other individual begin to develop, DELETE!
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